Giving Up

I'm sure every artist experiences it. So don't expect some flash of brilliance in insight or practice here. No heady words of wisdom.

It started out as a good idea. The model was beautiful and she held her head turned just so, in a way that spoke to classic beauty. I loved the pose. I sketched her. I even photographed her. And, I've tried to paint her in this pose. Several times.

But something happens to ruin the painting. I probably think too hard and feel too little. I'm sure I do that. This is the third time I have given up on an attempt at this painting. I've tried it small (9 X 12), medium (18 X 24) and now large (30 X 36). I've tried it in different styles. Realistic. Tonal. Expressionistic.

Maybe the next time I try, I will take all of the good things from my previous attempts, and paint what I know is there. It's beauty. The kind that speaks to truth and justice and peace.

But, this time, I'm giving up. I'm calling this painting attempt "The Girl Who Refused to be Painted."